Today marks the three year anniversary of your death, and I’m thinking of you with love. That’s all we can really ask, isn’t it? Just to be remembered with fondness and a deep appreciation of the gifts you gave while living.
I think of you so often. It’s been my habit to talk to you when I take my solo bike rides. When I look at the beautiful blue skies, I think of you and Dad together again, reunited after so many years of the difficulties of your illnesses. You are now without pain and sadness, and I’m grateful for that.
But as I look at all of the beautiful photos of you with our family, I remember all of the happy/sad/hard times and I miss you. I miss the talks we had – the phone calls for recipes, the chats keeping you up with our boys, the plans for coming to visit you and Dad at Christmas time and during our summers – or for your plans to travel to Texas. Your times with us will always be cherished.
I miss the visits to see you when you were starting to forget. The times you were sad and a little lost in your mind and how we reassured you. The giant hugs you gave so freely and how you called me “Texas” for a time. The visits to the Perky Parrot drinking coffee and catching up, even though you were often confused. The puzzles, the back rubs, the long drives.
Life is so strange. You raise your kids, and then if you are lucky enough, your kids start taking care of you. That hasn’t happened for me yet, Mom, but I’m guessing it will. I’ve already started prepping the boys! 🙂 But it really was a beautiful thing, amidst the hard. Even though I lived afar, I treasure those memories.
I’m so grateful for you and Dad. You really did a wonderful thing by raising us as a tight family unit. Admittedly, we’ve had some trying times since you went to be with God, but we’ll be ok. Life isn’t easy, but one thing I know is that family is everything. We’re going to do our best without you.
I miss you, Mom.